Tales and wails from the mind of..........

Of sickness and characters

2009-02-12T11:03:00.000-08:00

I recently had the pleasure of another visit by a virus, one that rendered me semi-delusional and running between bathroom and bed more often than I would have liked. I am a frequent home to these viruses, one would think my body and viruses have a good understanding between themselves. I find myself providing a safe bed and lodging to these viruses who only seem to grow in strength while in me and leave once they feel restored enough to take on the world.

Friends and colleagues often assume my absences for illness even when I am not, such is the frequency of my ailments. Not a very happy thought to be known as a sick person, but as a friend recently put it, I seem to be sick every six weeks.

Sick characters in books are however hard to find. There are heroes, villains, side-kicks, jokers and many other characters but there is never a sick one. The sick ones usually end up dead at some point in the book. In my case I am quite glad I don't live in a book. Hence I take great pride in the existence of "Stivvings", a character who featured in Jerome K Jerome's "Three Men in a Boat". Given below is the excerpt for reasons why he is memorable:

There was a boy at our school, we used to call him Sandford and Merton. His real name was Stivvings. He was the most extraordinary lad I ever came across. I believe he really liked study. He used to get into awful rows for sitting up in bed and reading Greek; and as for French irregular verbs there was simply no keeping him away from them. He was full of weird and unnatural notions about being a credit to his parents and an honour to the school; and he yearned to win prizes, and grow up and be a clever man, and had all those sorts of weak-minded ideas. I never knew such a strange creature, yet harmless, mind you, as the babe unborn.

Well, that boy used to get ill about twice a week, so that he couldn't go to school. There never was such a boy to get ill as that Sandford and Merton. If there was any known disease going within ten miles of him, he had it, and had it badly. He would take bronchitis in the dog-days, and have hay-fever at Christmas. After a six weeks' period of drought, he would be stricken down with rheumatic fever; and he would go out in a November fog and come home with a sunstroke.

They put him under laughing-gas one year, poor lad, and drew all his teeth, and gave him a false set, because he suffered so terribly with toothache; and then it turned to neuralgia and ear-ache. He was never without a cold, except once for nine weeks while he had scarlet fever; and he always had chilblains. During the great cholera scare of 1871, our neighbourhood was singularly free from it. There was only one reputed case in the whole parish: that case was young Stivvings.

He had to stop in bed when he was ill, and eat chicken and custards and hot-house grapes; and he would lie there and sob, because they wouldn't let him do Latin exercises, and took his German grammar away from him.

And we other boys, who would have sacrificed ten terms of our school-life for the sake of being ill for a day, and had no desire whatever to give our parents any excuse for being stuck-up about us, couldn't catch so much as a stiff neck. We fooled about in draughts, and it did us good, and freshened us up; and we took things to make us sick, and they made us fat, and gave us an appetite. Nothing we could think of seemed to make us ill until the holidays began. Then, on the breaking-up day, we caught colds, and whooping cough, and all kinds of disorders, which lasted till the term recommenced; when, in spite of everything we could manoeuvre to the contrary, we would get suddenly well again, and be better than ever.

Such is life; and we are but as grass that is cut down, and put into the oven and baked.

Rains in the city

2007-07-02T13:05:00.000-07:00

The weekend was one that was truly washed out. The rains struck the city, washing it clean, attempting to drown most of its residents and ensuring that our reputation for having little value for life continues to be true. 16 people died across the state of which five died in Mumbai. Five lives in a city of a crore died on one day. Not a very frightening statistic given the fact that maybe almost two die persons daily due to an accident or crime daily.
What is criminal about these deaths is that they didn't have to take place. It can be argued that neither do those who die of other causes. But then the state doesn't crores of rupees to ensure that those people stay alive. Three of the five people who died were washed away in flood waters. Floods and flooding is unusual to the city. Every year the streets are flooded for at least a couple of days every monsoon, I know since I have been wading through pools of water every monsoon with frightening regularity. But people being washed away by floods to me suggests criminal negligence.
Crores have been spent in widening the Mithi and shifting residents from their homes along its banks. Houses were allegedly moved from near nullahs to prevent them from being washed away. And yet the number rises. South Mumbai is right next to the sea, received more rainfall than the north last weekend and stayed with its head well above water.
We credit the British for their excellent town planning and drainage, then we must criticise our follies in allowing the non construction for the rest of it. For every rule that is modified because money pays for it, for every palm greased and every flouted rule there awaits a death, not necessarily the deserving one.

Aussies will be trounced though no time soon

2007-05-01T08:04:00.000-07:00

And the Aussies win yet another World Cup and we go into yet another tizzy wondering over whether we will ever be able to beat them. One can't be too sure about the Indian cricket team given their ability to choke even in the initial stages of a tournament, but the world I am sure will produce a team that will overcome the mighty Aussies. Why do I say that with so much conviction? Because sport like many things in the world is rather cyclical. The Aussies may be having a great time now but for many world cups prior to the last three, they were unable to clinch it. I also look for inspiration to the English Premier League to support my arguments. a few years ago Manchester United (the Red devils for whom no amount of praise is enough ) were on top of the league. They were invincible, ruthless and won almost every damn tournament that they played in. But one year later it was Arsenal that acquired their spot and just two years after that it has been Chelsea FC.
So let us not worry so much about the Aussies' invincibility. It exists and it is not a myth presently (as proven by New Zealand just a few weeks before the World Cup) but then it cannot last forever. If Clive Lloyd and his invincible West Indian team could be trounced I am prettyt sure anyone can be given their industriousness and luck during a tournament.
Also why on earth is the BCCI so concerned about operations in the ICC? With Indian cricket going through a phase that is likely to generate sufficient controversy in the coming days, it seems like a great move to divert attention to irrelevant points. BCCI, with its overflowing cash reserves, has always attracted characters like Jaywant Lele and Niranjan Shah who have the longevity and utility of a World Cup. Now that its over and we have been convincingly trounced let us get the present idiot out and usher in a new one, I would say he deserves the chance to prove his inefficiency and stupidity like his predecessors.

Narcotics, education and the law

2007-03-07T13:23:00.000-08:00

280 persons were arrested recently by the Pune police at a rave party near the infotech city. All have subsequently been taken into police custody and we have been reading stories about how all of them were innocent and none of them were part of the group consuming the narcotics that were found at the party.

We have also been subjected to views on how they have received preferential treatment with some being accorded better treatment by the cops than others.

There may be some truths for the police is known to have its own failures and drawbacks. However, while accepting that all of them are not guilty, let us accept that the guilty must be punished and it is not agreeable to consume narcotics. Why then the leniency towards some of them merely because they have the money, education or come from good families? Many of those arrested have been recorded as misbehaving in court, an act that would have fetched any lower criminal a punishment for contempt of court. Others gave false addresses when arrested another act that might have fetched 'special treatment' from the police for their intelligence in doing so.

Many of them as they were released assaulted media persons who filmed their departure from jail, an act that should have attracted sections of the IPC for assault. That mediapersons chose not to and the police did not choose to take action against them for it. And I wonder, why should I feel any sense of sympathy for these people? Are they all really victims of a police force that has nabbed more than they should have? Or are they just people who think that the law is for lesser mortals who do not have the same education as them or the monetary security?

Lets not get into the debate into what is a lesser and greater crime, for a crime is a crime irrespective of who commits it and if found guilty one must pay the price for it. Let the tests come out and the guilty will be separated from the innocent (though money may play an important role in this aspect as well). But let us not get caught in the trap of assuming that all of them are innocent young persons since they are not. Lets hope that justice takes its course just like it would for any other person arrested in a similar case.

Things to think about

2007-02-08T12:57:00.000-08:00

Sometimes it takes a conversation to give you a topic to think about. Things that you would not think about ordinarily simply because you would not have to and nothing in the life you lead forces you to think about it (unless it concerns you). So I have decided to chronicle these things for they may be important and might be life saving in some cases while in others may just be interesting knowledge that you could benefit from in the least expected moments of your life.
My topic for the day is: What happens if a lawyer wants to take a toilet break while a case is being heard?
Reliable sources have informed me that nothing can be done and the lawyers have to do something popularly known as "argue and bear it". And its only when the argument is over that they can leave, walk in a dignified manner out of the courtroom and then rush down the corridor maniacally until they find the first loo to empty themselves into. But this has raised frightening possibilities in my paranoid mind.
For I would not want a lawyer who is more worried about his bladder than my case arguing for me. And I can't really blame him/her for it. After all it is human to have a full bladder, a weak one or a bad stomach. Would it be against a lawyer's professional ethics to contest a case while he knew that he might have a full bladder while he was arguing the case? But it does explain why many lawyers after arguing their cases sometimes charge out of courtrooms, ignoring their clients and then vanish and can't be found.
So if you must choose a lawyer make sure he is one that can hold it when it matters. A start would be with gulping multiple glasses of water at your first meeting and waiting to see who goes first. If you go first, and are not a lawyer yourself, you might want to consider your choice.

The Dalai Lama and me

2007-01-31T11:27:00.000-08:00

Today was going to be the day they were going to throw it back to me but instead I managed to end up going for a talk by the Dalai Lama. Now obviously it was not a personal meeting, anyone who has seen me would know why, but then it is no less than the Dalai Lama so why would I pass up the opportunity?
For the uninitiated the Dalai Lama is the spiritual head of the Buddhists, one of the religions that has a lot of monks in it and has some pretty soothing music as their hymns. They also preach the usual stuff about truth and being good but with nice terms and they don't ask you to worship any God (at least as far as I know).
The Dalai Lama is an old man who is bald and wears glasses that look like dark glasses. He also cackles like a grandfather, waves to people when they wave to him and laughs at his own jokes which people don't really get. He spoke for two hours and quite expectedly didn't manage to say much. It would be too much to expect anyone to tell everyone how to solve their life's problems in the short span of two hours and he is no different.
And quite admittedly some of the stuff he said was not something unknown to me or many of the people present there. I mean we all know that we should not keep ourselves bottled up, every second woman and study tells us that. He spoke of mantaining inner peace so that you would feel happy in life, but then someone wrote that ages ago in the ancient Vedas. He spoke about tolerance, secularism, AIDS, global warming and everything we read about daily in the newspapers.
So whats so great about this guy? Or what can I say I really learnt from him in two hours of listening to him speak in a tongue as alien to him as his teachings might have been to me? Well that no one knows the answers to my or anyone else's problems. He was asked,"Is secularism dead in India?" and his frank reply,"I don't know! You should know better, you are an Indian!" And he was right. If we can't look into ourselves and know whether we are secular or not, how can we judge society? His answers were not as spiritual as they were practical, he admitted to not knowing answers to anyone's problems and just gave them suggestions. And the best statement for the day? "I once spoke to a religious leader, a friend, and I told him that we need to be less serious so that we make more sense to more people," said the venerable Lama, before cackling happily. I don't know what I expected to see but what was a pleasant surprise was to see an old man, a happy and peaceful old man who could give valuable advice to show you a way and one who knew a few more answers that not many did.

p.s: Though it must be said that the audience of Mumbai was as uncouth as could be. And not the poor who came in their best clothes just to see the Lama but those who came 'dressed down' in their designer ware and sat in the VIP area. They walked off while he was on the stage, they air kissed in the hall before the end and treated it much like they would have a fashion show.
Some may say its Mumbai attitude but its still uncouth and maybe something we could afford to lose.

To war!!! (all for Shilpa)

2007-01-18T12:48:00.000-08:00

These are grim times we live in. With the threat of nuclear war looming large over us and the Western and Eastern world very polarized, it is a time to hold your loved ones that bit closer, reminiscence about your life and be convinced that you should have shot your irritating neighbour’s barking dog when you had the chance. If you as usual, have stayed cocooned from the world with the pitiful excuse of work and bettering society, then you my friend have been living in a fool’s world, for a storm has been brewing and it involved a lissome lass from our country who traveled across two seas to be paid to be called a Pakistani and a dog.

Yes, it is to the Shilpa Shetty controversy that I refer. The one involving a foul mouthed woman, a lot of other people, some cameras, and a big house all of which apparently somehow makes up a television show that no one seems to want to watch until a diplomatic issue is created.

Imagine the corridors of the Westminster Abbey on a cold and frosty night, when even the spies grudge themselves a night’s sleep albeit with a bit of guilt. And then they switched on the television where the P-word is put out into the universe and the somewhat weepy Shilpa is called no less than a dog.

Suddenly, phones rang across the UK and the globe, with thousands of Indians calling each other to tell each other that they had seen Shilpa, their own Shilpa, the one who came to see them only when she released a movie that no one wanted to see, being racially insulted. I am sure for a very brief instant the English government feared that the Indians were finally taking over after making them dependent on their now famous curry.

I mean look at it. The mallus have the Gelf, the gujjus have the UH, the sardars have the Kaneda and Africa is to busy fighting with itself and is unlikely to do anything about anything anyway. So I can understand the stab of fear the west felt when they heard of the incident and promptly went into damage control mode by telling us that there was no racism except among common people.

But now as we stand facing each other across two continents, nuclear weapons at the ready, we must wonder, what can we really do? In the words of a villain of a movie starring the incredibly fast Jet Li, “There is a time for diplomacy and there is a time for action…The diplomacy is over.” After that he begins shooting, and Jet Li does his kung fu stuff, and since none of us can do either I say, at least let’s do away with diplomacy. The Brits had the chance and they blew it. Now it’s our turn.

Let us start by calling a British celebrity onto our very own version of the show and put him/her in the same room as our own guys and see how he does. Then when the Brits call to say that they don’t like being called Americans, we can give them the Gabbar Singh laugh. I further say, lets give them a dose of their own medicine by doing the same things that they do. Let us also breed tabloids that publish bilge, breed an attitude of absolute conformism when it comes to foreign policy, be racist to anyone darker than white and have irrelevant national celebrities. The frightening part is, we have done that.

Walking with Jesus

2006-04-19T14:46:00.000-07:00

When you walk with Jesus everyone sees you
They point at you and think they know you.
They feel better about themselves and the world
And cheer in their own minds for something they know doesn't matter.

Jesus walks silently among the crowd for he is no longer him,
Now he's the regular Mario, the man from Mira Road.
He once was Jesus, and fell thrice to his knees
As he walked after meeting Pontius Pilate to be crucified.

The kids point and smile, but he pretends
Like he has no idea who they are talking about
He talks about his life, his mundane life in which
His only wife and daughter never saw him become Jesus

The time he walked and fell harder to impress others
Or when he swooned in pain as the cross hung heavy on his back
With only some mince and bread in his stomach
A prayer on his parched lips and bad actors trying to comfort him

He now says he works only for Jesus
And cures people of things they await their Lord to cure.
He gives them hope when they think all is lost
But has never misused his power over them.

Mario watches the enactment and praises Jesus this year
A good choice he is and he can act,
But he still needs a lot to learn and
Maybe by next year he will be ready for this.

Being Cyrus

2006-04-01T11:53:00.000-08:00

A whimsical sculptor, a desperate housewife, a greedy son, a rich old Parsi gentleman and a seemingly unassuming Cyrus Mistry are the characters who are part of the plot of the film ‘Being Cyrus’. Directed by debutant director Homi Adajania the movie is a convoluted look at the Sethna family through the eyes of the young Mr Mistry. And while the movie may fail to impress or enrapture its audience it does entertain and provide one with the feeling of money well spent.

The movie opens with a glimpse into the life of the wandering Cyrus Mistry (Saif Ali Khan) who is out on the road with a bag full of money and a heavy conscience. We are told that he was a poor little orphan who lived with his sister in foster homes and then grew up into something he hates being. Cyrus then walks into the Panchgani home and lives of once famous but now forgotten potter Dinshaw Sethna (Nasseruddin Shah) and his beautiful wife Katy (Dimple Kapadia). Since he can’t refuse, Dinshaw takes Cyrus into his house as an apprentice and Katy takes him into her life as a means to satisfy her unfulfilled dreams. From there on the audience is introduced to the different members of the Sethna family, all of whom are quirkily different. Fardounjee Sethna (Honey Chhaya) who owns a building in Mumbai but lives in the smallest and darkest room, his son Farrukh (Boman Irani) who stays in a palatial house next door and ill treats his father, and Farrukh’s demure wife Tina (Simone Singh). Gradually Cyrus gets drawn into the politics of the family and soon we realise that there is more to the Sethna family than just a family full of people with idiosyncrasies.

The plot is simple and barring a few twists, little that would tax the brains too much. The movie is slickly edited and is kept taut throughout and despite the occasional dreams of Cyrus it does not waver too much. The dialogues are very well written and the funniest parts of the film arise thanks to them. Adajania also makes the most of his Parsi lineage to highlight almost every known eccentricity of the community.

Saif Ali Khan as the ‘nice boy with a bad past and troubled present’ Cyrus is believable and is likeable throughout the movie. Boman Irani as the hyper-verbal Farrukh is as ever entertaining and excels in a scene where he argues with another resident of the bulding. Simone Singh as Tina has little to do besides look nice and demure which she manages to do effortlessly. Honey Chhaya also deserves notable mention for his seemingly natural portrayal of the senile Fardounjee.

Dimple Kapadia looks great on screen and does really well as the desperate Katy but does tend to grate a little on the nerves with her hysterics. But it is Nasseruddin Shah who steps into the shoes of the doped out sculptor Dinshaw and walks away rather effortlessly with the accolades. Dinshaw’s whimsies, his madness and his tiredness from all things material are brought to the screen brilliantly by Shah and saves the character from becoming a caricature. All in all, the movie is a good watch and is easily among the best Indian movies in English to come out in recent times.

Balls of steel

2006-03-31T13:30:00.002-08:00

For reasons best known to me I have had the privilege of being able to see the legal system in the city of Mumbai up close and personal. Now like any other legal system, it has its set of faults and can at times come up with the most bizarre things that you heard of. Of course thats not untrue of any aspect of this world but then since I have some sort of knowledge about some of the courts, I shall divulge some things that I do hear out there

On November 7, 1993, a 21-year old man Avdesh Mishra decided that it being the auspicious occasion of Diwali he should visit his relatives. A resident of the western suburb of Goregaon, he decided that he would go to his nearby cousin's house. When he went to his cousin Chandramohan's house he noticed that the colour scheme of the rooms of the chawl did not quite appease his aesthetic sense. In his attempt to inculcate the appropriate knowledge about the need for art he told Chandramohan, " Tera baap bhikari hai kya? Diwali hote hue bhi colour nahin lagata?"(Is your father a beggar? Can't he afford to paint the walls to celebrate Diwali?)

Whether it was the comparison or his sheer disagreement over the need to paint the walls it will never be known, but Chandramohan thought it better to abuse Avdesh than let the comment pass. His brother, Hemantkumar who till that point was part of the general celebrations also thought it worthwhile to join his brother in abusing Avdesh. Avdesh having the typically high concentration of haemoglobin that is often seen in some males chose to strike out at his beloved cousins.

In the resulting fracas, Avdesh managed to land a solid kick right in Hemantkumar's family jewels and clutching them he went down. The unfortunate part was that Hemantkumar suffered what has now been proven to be a 'epileptic attack'. Chandramohan and his wife then rushed the unfortunate Hemantkumar to a nearby hospital only to find that there were no doctors there since they were also busy celebrating Diwali. So they brought him back home where he proceeded to pass away. Unfortunately, Chandramohan could not see him off since he had gone to call the police who along with him took Hemantkumar to the Cooper Hospital where he could be declared dead officially. The police then proceeded to arrest Avdesh. He was later released on bail.

During the trial Avdesh was charged with murder. However, Chandrakant and his wife were unable to agree where Hemantkumar received the crucial kick. Whether it was a married lady's unrequired modesty or just the truth we shall never know, but Chandrakant's wife told the court that Hemantkumar had been kicked in the back. Chandrakant however maintained his version.

But then came the clincher. The medical report stated that Hemantkumar despite being kicked where he was had sustained no injury in the concerned region. The medical report in fact only confirmed that Hemantkumar was dead but remained rather unsure about why. It said that it was cardiac arrest that killed him but the reason for the cardiac arrest was unknown and said that a kick had caused him to have the epileptic fit which eventually killed him. And so since there was not enough evidence against him ,Avdesh had the fortune of being acquitted by the court.

(this may not be entirely accurate and since I have not seen the medical report myself I don't know what exactly the report says. The version above is what the lawyer of the defendent managed to prove and said. It has been suitably modified but the facts of the case are all there. )

2005-09-17T13:24:00.000-07:00

Yet another day of all work and no play and its finally official that I am one of the many mindless individuals who inhabit an office space and perhaps shall do that till the day I die. Or might just end up going in the exact opposite direction and might cut loose so much that i might lose all my bearings with the society that is playing host to me presently. Its something like a molotov cocktail having loneliness, anger, frustration and fear all bottled up in the same mind. Its perhaps the single best way to achieve nothing, not even realise that I am not moving at all and am just standing at the same spot.

2005-07-14T14:14:00.000-07:00

July the 14th. Nothing really special about it except that they discovered that the London blasts were caused by people that were seemingly normal and at times pointedly compassionate people. People who were perhaps better in character than me but due to one bad connection among the neurons they strapped explosives to their bodies and blew themselves to pieces. Sometimes I wonder how different we are from the lemmings that we mock when they jump off a cliff to their deaths. We are the same, and when we arent jumping off the cliffs ourselves there are enough idiots around to ensure that we get pushed off anyway.

2005-07-13T13:29:00.000-07:00

Read a recent article on how the prices of cancer drugs is very high despite them guranteeing only a few weeks of life. Its difficult to imagine what it must be like to not have enough money to pay for a few weeks of life. The despair of knowing that depite the drug life may be only a few weeks longer, where every minute would hopefully last an eternity and every day even longer. A way of living when every moment of time is as valuable as life itself and where the only thing that one really wants is to just be alive. No more. Not the riches and luxuries we crave and pursue so zealously, not the hatred we choose to let fester against some, not anything ever defined by man. Man in his ultimate quest for happiness forgot what it really felt like. It was far more elemental and simple than ever thought. A deep breath, a pleasant smell, a warm body besides you, a comfortable bed, love in the heart, a full stomach and a body that works perhaps rank among the most basic sources of happiness. Its somehow not that easy anymore. Or is it?

2005-07-13T13:11:00.000-07:00

Read a strange case today where a woman was thrown into jail for sleeping with a 16 year old. Strange simply because it seemed more like the kid was out to have a good time and got it and as a final nail in the whole thing his parents managed to get the lady thrown into jail. What seemed like a case of paedophilia from a lurid headline and graphic picture turned out to merely be a tale of a kid who got lucky at an age when most boys are praying to get laid.

2005-07-12T14:04:00.000-07:00

Saw the movie and loved it. Finally some one got what Tim Burton got almost right and managed to get it just right. Hats off to you Mr Nolan you seem to have understood what the Batman freaks of the world were looking for. It is not the caped wonder that drives our imagination but the fact that he is a mortal man as given to fears and demons as any of us. Christian Bale may not be the best Batman but is definitely the best Bruce Wayne and narrowly pips Michael Keaton. Bale's got my vote for the next installment as well if he does not think it infra dig to do another Batman. Though could they try and get Nicholson back for Joker?

2005-07-12T13:58:00.000-07:00

Am now at work with a job that I think is something I like doing though I am not too happy the way I am doing it. Writing is now part of the job and seems to make the process even harder to do when I am not at work but the advantage is that I do have a faster typing speed though it has nothing to do with the reader of this.
The London bombings proved yet again that terrorism is here to stay and will perhaps become part of our daily life with time. We will be shocked but the sad part is that with time we shall be shocked only by the big attacks and not with the smaller ones which ironically may force terrorists to outdo themselves just in order to ensure that the impact is felt. Terrorism be it inspired by religion, political ideology, money or plain insanity is perhaps the saddest way to publicise a cause. Innocent lives whether lost in terrorist attacks or wars is of no less value because they were killed in a battle they were not part of. Perhaps with time we can hope to try and destroy the business of war and the stranglehold of fanaticism and learn about peace. The most bizarre thing was that Tony Blair had the audacity to blame the attack on an Islamist type attack despite not having any proof to show to the world.When the leader of an multi-ethnice nation like Britain can so easily pass such a communal comment is it justified to blame others when they do the same? Admittedly the attacks seemed Al-Qaedaish but to call it an Islamist type attack is the sign of a man who has a fixed agenda and will not look beyond what suits his present policies and decsions best.
In other news Bush managed to tumble off his bicycle and crash into a cop who had to be taken to hospital.Am quite sure Bush went head first into him which is what caused the great damage. Imagine a helmet containing pure rock slamming into a human body. The policeman didnt stand a chance.

Aah work

2005-06-21T01:49:00.000-07:00

The monsoons have hit Mumbai at last and what a beautiful strike it is. The freshness that comes with the rain, the skies a dull grey, the smell of the earth and the green of leaves enchant the mind and leave it mesmerized and lost in thought over beauty. Being made up mostly of water perhaps makes us happier when we are in the presence of the compound that is an essential part of our beings. Everything looks beautiful and the mind craves a peace that perhaps nature once gave to its children.
A time when a caveman sat and watched nature as she replenished her parched lands and wondered only about the wonders that surrounded him and worshipped it. With time the wonder that the caveman felt everytime he saw the beauty of the rains has perhaps faded but the joy of feeling the largesse of mother nature remains. There are few sensations as remarkable as standing in the rain and letting it parch a part of you. A feeling that makes it worthwhile to be alive. Sometimes we understand so much and yet know so little about anything but then maybe thats why we are as ignorant a race as we are.
I remember the house in Kerala on the hill. A place where for brief periods of time we could view the plans of the weather gods and know where and when it was to rain. A place where we could see the gods vent their fury with bolts of lightning and the drums of thunder and for a brief moment feel truly alive. Where the rain would strike the earth gently and lovingly some times like a loving mother and beat upon it with passion sometimes like a crazed drummer, where the trees smelt of a perfume that man will perhaps never create ,where the mud turned from a parched red to a satiated hue of brown and where crickets would chirp the night away singing for the company of a missing mate. Where the dry lawn in the back would suddenly sprout grass and suddenly look as though it had escaped from some master’s painting and the world suddenly seemed a lot more beautiful and life seemed simple and easy and the mad world with its worries pains and hatred seemed a world away. I miss that world.

And I shall return

2005-05-29T06:51:00.000-07:00

My computer after a prolonged battle against obsoleteness and dust and a feeble IC had finally conked off leaving me disconnected from cyberspace. However i am finally saved and my connection to cyberspace has been restored at last thanks to a man named Moses. I shall be back and that too soon.

2005-03-09T04:07:00.000-08:00

The sheer waste of time is horrible and is driving me insane. When there is a lack of work it gives the mind ample time to think and perhaps one of the greatest curses of being human is the curse of being able to think. Given due thought everything is questionable and doubtful. Suddenly things arent clear anymore. Is it worth it to take on a career that involves people when I seem to have little interest in people and is it wise to ignore the financial aspect of it all considering that life seems to be highly dependent on money. Aargh! It feels like my head is running in different directions and doesn't know where it wants to go.

2005-02-06T09:29:00.000-08:00

Have you caught it yet? If you havent then what are you waiting for?

2005-02-04T04:43:00.000-08:00

'Black' directed by Sanjay Leela Bhansali is a film that might not set the cash registers ringing but for those who will brave critics reviews and popular reviews and see the movie, it will be an experience unlike anything else you would have seen in recent times in mainstream Hindi cinema. A movie made by a master artist with a cast that delivers performances that are spell binding and compelling 'Black' is a movie that is for those who have scoured the movie halls for long searching for good mainstream cinema.

'Black' is a story of two individuals, one a girl who is blind and deaf and her teacher a man who refuses to let the world deny her anything and more importantly does not let her deny herself anything. 'Black' opens with Debraj Sahai who is in a mental institution, since he suffers from Alzheimer's disease, being taught by his student Michelle McNeally about the world. Michelle McNeally (Rani Mukherjee) was a girl born deaf and blind which leaves little in her world besides the blackness that surrounds her. To be sent to a mental institution she is left to her own devices, until the day she gets a new teacher, Debraj Sahai. A man who is a magician with the blind and yet fighting his own demons, he decides to take up the case of Michelle McNeally as a challenge. From there on it is a story of how the teacher and student work together and achieve their dreams and desires. The meeting between the teacher and student and the disciplining of the student are entertaining and they are balanced by moments of poignancy like when Sahai begins to realize that his memory has begun to fade or the jealousy of Michelle's sister towards Michelle. The movie abstains from preaching to the audience about handicapped persons rights and merely shows how they too want nothing but to have their place in the sun. There is a scene when Sahai is asked to send Michelle to a special school and he retorts that all they would teach her is to make baskets and not to be equal with the world. The interactions between Sahai and Michelle are done beautifully and sensitively and reflect their dependence on each other. The world the characters live in fantastical and all characters are shown as being inherently good and generous in spirit but then they are minor arguments against an overall good movie. The script is held together by good dialogues and the musical score is also very good and blends beautifully with the images of the movie.

Ayesha Kapur as the 10 year old Michelle is very convincing and does a wonderful job. Rani Mukherjee as the older Michelle brings life to the character and gives a performance that is superb, heartfelt and sensitive and confirms her space as one of Hindi cinema's finest actresses. Shernaz Patel as Michelle McNeally's mother deserves a mention for a sensitive performance. Sanjay Leela Bhansali throws away the palette of colours he used for 'Devdas' and sticks to a moody black throughout the film. An artist, Bhansali using the canvas of cinema and the paints of light, shade and the colour black has made a movie in which each frame is as beautiful as a fine painting. This movie is truly the work of an artist and is evident from the very first frame till the last. The final accolades have been reserved for the greatest actor of this generation Amitabh Bachchan who gives a performance that is easily among the best in his career if not the best. Debraj Sahai comes to life thanks to him and as he dances, sings, rages, weeps, commands and guides his student you are held enthralled by a performance that is simply exceptional.
A must watch for those who like to watch good cinema and for those who think that Indian cinema is all about songs and dances and musicals. Kudos to Sanjay Leela Bhansali, for a daring to make a movie as unconventional as this, more so at a time when most seem to be concerned more with the appearance of the movie and not the content.

2005-01-27T08:45:00.000-08:00

Aah the joys of seating oneself in front of the computer and typing nonsense. So much has been happening in the last week that I thought Id have enough to sit and write about. Two sentences later I am beginning to wonder if I am merely going to end up humiliating myself but then that wouldnt be something new, perhaps only a man by the name of George W. Bush has a greater desire and ability to keep a foot in the mouth at all times.
Speaking of good, old Dubya I cant seem to find him anymore on the news networks. It is so remarkable for a person from this country to see such languid behaviour after being elected to office. Over here we are used to seeing ministers occupying their posts even before they have been allotted to them and even continue to occupy the houses and offices allotted to them well after being removed from office. Though I am sure Bush will be back with a bang. Even if he isnt theres the ever present axis of evil he will continue to shadow box with and has to smoke out the rascals of the axis no matter where they are. A few thousand troops is a small price when compared to the larger gain which is errrsomething someone who advices Bush knows.

The bank where I go to has implemented what is known as core banking. A fancy term for a fancy system that seems to drive everyone nuts besides the sagacious old guard who quite wisely tells people that unless they have urgent work they would do well to come another day. The past few weeks have been nothing but mayhem with lines that snaked through most of the bank with people just joining any line in the hope that it would take them to a counter where their work would be done. The beauty of central government organizations is that they implement the latest systems but they consistently ignore a crucial step in the implementation process called training, without which unfortunately any system seems to work as efficiently as a Windows system. So I had the opportunity of seeing old Uncles arguing with bank staff with statements like What ya buggers do all the time? and often was the listening post for many an aggrieved customer. They seemed to think that I would have an intelligent opinion to share regarding how the bank was going to the dogs but then how were they to know of my lack of ability to make intelligent comments regarding anything?

I have also tried to enhance my health and appearance in keeping with the general trends of my contemporaries. After all this is the age of appearance when bodies are toned, enough gel in hair to lubricate condoms and machinery into the next millennium, jeans low enough to ensure underwear remains under nothing and every one seems to have an accent regardless of whether they have stepped beyond the limits of the city. I have tried gel but due to the lack of hair on my head it makes as much impact as the researcher who said that Bush was intelligent. I try clothes of various types but the clothing industry seems to have conspired against me to ensure that I shall never look very becoming in clothes (and no I am not willing to try nudity). I dont get it, why cant I be like one of the dudes? Although I am still undecided as to whether the lack of my conformity is as bad a thing as I make it out to be.

2005-01-14T11:48:00.000-08:00

Saw the Kanheri caves at National Park, mumbai today. Quite a few miles from the entrance the caves lie at the border of the only forest in the heart of a metropolitan city in the world. These caves were carved by monks between 1B.C and later. The most remarkable part about the caves are that there are over a hundred of them on the hills, all of them carved into rock by hand. No explosives, no fancy machinery and do-hickey things just god-provided tools, a few man made tools and a whole lot of faith. Its remarkable the strength faith can give a man. The entrance to the main cave has two Buddhas that i read somewhere to be only seven feet high while in reality they are almost twenty feet high. A civilization of monks driven by faith carved the most spectacular buddhas into rock, carved over 100 caves into a hill, lived there braving the elements, carved their messages of faith into rock hoping that future generations would read them and maybe find the path of peace. However the language lies forgotten, the carvings fade into obscurity and the handful that do know what it means dont take the trouble to put it up. The message lies lost in time but what I wonder more about is that if it had been put up would we have found the time to understand and implement it.Scary isnt it? Every few years a man discovers a truth, its a fad for a few years and then its lost in the annals of time and all that remains is a rehashed version of the truth once said. freaky and not to be taken seriously for i am just babbling under the influence of weariness.

2005-01-13T09:05:00.000-08:00

Making a career out of being useless. Too lazy to get work done and I lack the genius to get people to approach me so am compelled to get of my big butt and start the running around. 'Tis a bad thing to be lazy and it is even worse to have no work and be unoccupied. Compliments and praises do not provide one's meals and I still have a long way to go in that department.
Saw the movie "12 Angry Men" which has to be one of the best films ever made. Grappling with the issues of justice, personal prejudices and people's natures its a movie that holds your attention and doesnt let go till the very end. I had seen a recent version of it with George C. Scott acting in it and I wish he had been available while they had been making the old version. No disrespect intended to Lee Cobb but the fact is that Mr. George brought a greater sense of rage to the role and had a look of insanity in his eyes that held me the first time I saw it. Watch the old version because it is the original and watch the new version for George C. Scott
The tsunami relief continues to pour in and yet there are perhaps years of work needed before we can even begin to consider that we have truly overcome it, that is purely in the economic sense. The people who have suffered due to it will never forget it. It is only the couch potato sitting and viewing the situation as displayed on a cathode ray tube or LCD screen who will forget it as soon as its off the news. And it will be. Once the dead are counted, once the basic repairs are begun and life beigns to reach some sense of normalcy the news cameras will vanish. It is then that the true test of the rehabilitation efforts will begin for then the greedy will no longer have to fear the media and the theft that has been delayed eventually will occur. It is a recipe to line the pockets of the corrupt but yet I hope that there will be a change and the rehabilitation will continue unabated and unhindered until it is truly completed.

2005-01-08T12:44:00.000-08:00

Saw Michael Moore's documentaries "Bowling for Columbine" and "farenheit 9/11". Remarkable documentaries and as I had read in the article by Swaminathan Aiyar even more so because they are blatantly socialist documenatries that have been released in the very heart of capitalism by capitalists and yet it has been a resounding success. Whether this means that Americans are sociaists who have embraced capitalism i know not and frankly I am not really concerned about it either. Moore is scathing on Bush and is so horribly a democrat that in his earnest to pull down the republicans ignores all the things that the democrats could have corrected while they were in power and chose not to. I don't know much about the american political system but what i do know is the current president is an ass and so is everyone else if they couldnt stop him from going on wild trips on fantasy ever so often.
Indian politicians have no qualms about making sure that the majority of the people live lives that reduce them to mere numbers. What I wonder is that if i made a movie that showed the truth about the political sytem in India would it be allowed to release in theatres and more importantly would anyone besides politicians, who would want to stone the theatre after the movie, get to see it? We protest about implications about lesbianism in our movies, we protest about religion, we protest about showing the truth in it. so then are we as free as we like to beleive or is it that we can be free as long as we are allowed to be free by the powers that be. A debate that still hasnt yielded any answers in all these years of existence of humanity and is present in every civilization and undoubtedly there arent going to to be any answers soon.

2004-12-26T10:45:00.000-08:00

The days go by even slower than I thought they could. Its amazing how slowly time can pass when you have absolutely nothing to do and how quickly it can pass if you want to do something within a limited period of time. Life has seldom been as frustrating and I am as lost as you can get when you can be lost and suddenly nothing is clear. I came across this mail which I had received some time back and that got me thinking as to what I believe in, see how much do you believe in and tell me about it:
1) I believe that life comes by only once and we never realize its value until its too late.
2) I believe most of us wont live to a ripe old age like our forefathers.
3) I believe that my friends are the only reason for my questionable sanity in this world overflowing with insanity.
4) I believe music is a gift from the gods and can whet the appetite of the soul for peace.
5) I believe that money can only give you a temporary sense of satisfaction, its the people you know and love who actually complete your life.
6) I believe that all of us have a duty towards society being the educated youth of our nation.
7) I believe that many of the people you call your friends today may not know you a year from now.
8) I believe that violence is the solution offered to and accepted by the desperate because they find it easier to act as animals rather than humans.
9) I believe that there is no organized or any other type of religion that can give you true peace. Religion in the present day is merely another reason to kill your fellow human beings.
10) I believe there is a God but I have no idea as to who or what he is. And I believe that no religion knows this either.
11) I believe that someday we will know why we were actually placed on this planet.
12) I believe that there is no extra-terrestrial life out there and in the remote possibility of their existence we do not deserve to know them because they are downright dumb for not contacting us for so many millennia.
13) I believe that every individual needs his/her own space on which nobody has a right to intrude upon.
14) I believe that it is never to late to meet up with lost friends.
15) I believe that the borders of this world should be torn down so that we can form a world community that strives for the betterment of the human race.
16) I believe that most of us will live the lives our parents have lived and someday we will use the same words they use on us in the present day.
17) I believe we will all die someday and should appreciate everything and everyone we have with us. (Though I need some coaching in that regard)
18) I believe that most of us will die anonymous with a handful of people actually feeling the loss of our departure.
19) I believe that most of us will never become what we dreamed of becoming.
20) I believe that there are few things as beautiful as a sunrise, sunset, a storm, a baby smiling, a star studded sky, the clouds floating across the sky and the face of the one you love.
21) I believe most of us will not meet our ideal partner for life but will learn to appreciate and love whomever we may settle down with.
22) I believe that machines will never rule over man in our lifetimes but we are to become more and more dependent on them with the passage of time so much so that machines will perform the most menial tasks.
23) I believe that the population explosion I this country will be its undoing.
24) I believe that racism, regionalism and communalism are the three worst enemies of mankind and will be its undoing.
25) I believe we have rights but we are too lazy to use them

Tragedy in India

2004-12-26T03:49:00.000-08:00

A modern day tragedy of sorts tidal waves struck the east coast of India this morning and has caused widespread havoc all over India and Sri Lanka and many other South east Asian countries. What are the casualties, what are the damages, how many will be reduced to begging, how much relief is provided, how many get the relief they deserve will all be seen in the coming days . A short prayer for those affected.
Top News Article | Reuters.com

2004-12-26T03:39:00.000-08:00

Christmas went well, actually better than expected and that makes you appreciate family.No matter how close or distant you are to them, at times they prove to be lifesavers.Christmassy feelings fade in the light of the general hype accompanying Christmas and at times I begin to wonder whether a peaceful and quiet Christmas without the now requisite orgy of celebrations is possible. I am all for the celebrations of all festivals and i also believe that no festival should be restricted to a religion however these days the true spirit of festivals seems to be being forgotten with everything having become a sound, lights and pyrotechnics event. Whether to blame the media, commercialization of festivals by individuals, religious leaders who seem to encourage closed minds or an unknown entity that I dont know, I know not but what I know is that I preferred the old style of celebrations where peace accompanied a festival and no festival was a game of one upmanship. Maybe I am growing older faster than I should but then there seems to be no solution for it either.

2004-12-26T03:30:00.000-08:00

Back where I belong and trying to get back to all the routines I normally call 'life'. While most seem to be going on paths of self discovery and discovery of truths I remain ever the same, untouched by anything continuing in routines I would give an arm and leg to change.
The truth always hurts but realization stings. Its worse when you trick yourself into beleiving things a small voice in your heart tells you are not the way they seem. Eventualities exist but delaying them gives no pleasure or joy. No matter what I do to try and avoid it it creeps around corners to meet me. A friend of mine regrets using escapism to escape reality but then at times an escape is perhaps the best thing to have. As James Bond is rightly advised by Q in a movie; always have an escape plan. Sad part is there was no escape planned and am caught between whether to sit and figure out a plan to escape or whether I want to even escape at all.

Back..though I wish not yet

2004-12-21T22:27:00.000-08:00

I have finally returned from my travels and am quite frankly rather exhausted from my trip. Kerala is a very beautiful place and it is difficult to tear yourself away from its embrace to return to the mayhem of a city like Bombay. Been walking the last few days and legs feel more like rubber than flesh but then it isn't such a bad feeling either. Dead tired but have managed to stay awake the whole day and now am beginning to regret having done that. Sleep beckons and refuses to leave me in peace. I give in.

2004-11-30T23:59:00.000-08:00

I am sure that one day in the future I will view these past few months and it will be only regret that I shall feel about them. Little progress has been achieved, a little overdue knowledge has been gained but then nothing that is particularly noteworthy. Perhaps this will go down as the most unproductive six months of my life. Well they say everythins is part of the learning curve and I sincerely hope this is part of it otherwise the God of time (if he exists) owes me these six months as a refund.
I am fast joining the rather vocal group who want test cricket to be stopped at least being played in India. I believe they should play all the tests in Australia where the grounds are big, lovely and green, the pitches favour some outcome and not five days of montony. I think the only thing more boring than a slow test match is golf but then thats an unfair comparison. Golf is by far the most boring viewing sport. Even watching the spelling bees held on ESPN are more lively and entertaining. The contestant who looks like he/she doesnt see the sun much is given a huge word by a guy who sounds like he were delivering a death sentence (though I cant think of any entertaining way to say such huge and twisted words maybe I would prefer death rather than trying to spell them) and then repeats it, asks for the meaning, repeats it some more times and then has a sporting go at trying to spell it. Even worse there are actually commentators who try and give commentary during this event. Most of their sentences are'

"do you think he's gonna get it?"

" I think so. Look at the concentraion on his face"

After numerous such banal comments they then sit and analyze every thing about the event though I havent watched it long enough to hear what the actually talk about but I am guessing its along the lines of "Do you think...." I am sure the contestants are very smart and I am sure we are all very proud of the fact that they can use large words in case of a national emergency or in case they need a human dictionary to solve a crossword to save the earth but the least that can be done for ignorant, and boorish viewers like me is that they put cheerleaders or something to make it more exciting. Though I wonder then whether any of the judges or the contestants would get any of the words right.

Just another day

2004-11-29T23:56:00.000-08:00

Bad day it turned out to be. Sort of like hearing Creedence Clearwater Revival singing "Bad moon rising'. Sort of like seeing trouble on the way bracing to bear it but then its too much to endure and you are flattened by it. Felt lower than i have in quite some time and resorted to a walk by the sea face to clear up the cowebs of despair clinging to the mind. I sometimes feel if I wasnt fortnate enough to be living so near the sea I might have gone insane by now. Sometimes my good fortune seems too good to be true and I at times am befuddled by it. Its like living in a perfect bubble which I know is bound to burst (or maybe it has and I just havent noticed it) and that is a very scary prospect. Hope that such days dont come by too often.
The Ambani battle rages on in newsprint with emails and any sentence they say finding its way to newsprint. The Ambani's are among the richest industrialist families in India and currently the two brothers to whom their father left the company are battling for control over the company. I wonder why it matters what their family problems are. As far as i am concerned all I want to know is if the company is to be split and if so then how does it affect the thousands of shareholders in the company. I really dont give a damn about the rest of the stuff and I know that if, god forbid, there are similar problems in my family I wouldnt want it on the front page of every newpaper and media. Let the family settle their battles and let us concern ourselves more with relevant issues rather than trivialities.

2004-11-29T10:39:00.000-08:00

It aint easy being the listening post for all things and all worries but then I try to give some level of satisfaction.

2004-11-27T10:15:00.000-08:00

Nothing much done today. The usual lasitude of Saturday was upon me and it was too much of an effort to shake it off so didnt bother trying.Read about the Ambani scandal and about automobiles and other columns that are always read. I guess I am a combination of Lord Nelson and Don Quixote. Lord Nelson was playing a game when he was informed of the impending arrival of the Spanish Armada when he said that there was enough time to finish the game and then finish the spaniards. I am a bit like him in that respect only I am as prepared as Don Quixote to face my problems which are more self created then those created by circumstance. Overconfidence and laziness seem to be a way of life. Off now back to work to try and make up some lost ground.

2004-11-26T10:07:00.000-08:00

Yet another day drifts by in a haze of laziness and nothingness.Its almost frightening and if I were to actually sit and analyze how I use my time I am very likely to be shocked so badly that it might just be the end of me. But then hope keeps me going and I go on aimlessly and carelessly boldly into the future for truly ignorance is bliss. Ignorance about being ignorant is even greater bliss but then I have been denied that luxury.
Read in the newspapers that female infanticide continues in Gujarat and many other states despite all attempts to curb it. What is more shocking is that there are educated people who resort to such inhumanities and that there are doctors who try and make a quick buck out of despicable social norms. We Indians constantly rant about out culture and how it makes us so much more superior to other races. Its almost like the only comfort blanket we have other than the economic progress of the middle class. Its our trump card against advanced nations and any thing else where we are found wanting. If you were to point out any drawbacks to the average, pompous, middle class or upper middle class person he will tell you of this great culture of ours that has existed for over millenia. The rich dont give too much of a damn about culture and the poor, well they are too busy surviving to really care. What good is a culture I ask you if such despicable things as female infanticide still exists and it is still considered a curse to havea girl? Throw it away I say this culture if it makes you lose your humanity. Culture is for humans and not for those that lack the humanity to be considered human.
What is to be done as a remedy? Ban dowry outright in marriages. Tax any individual stringently if there is found to be any accrued wealth or money post marriage.Punish both the giver and the taker of dowry.Let it be made socially known that any form of dowry whether payement in entirety for marriage ceremonies, cash payments or any form of asked dowry is not given or taken. Religious leaders should take a stand on this and make the followers well aware of the flaws in the reigious system. Utopian concepts I admit but then there has to be a start made. Dowry is apparently banned in India but if so then why is it still considered such a tragedy to give birth to a girl? Doctors taking part in such a despicable activity and their degrees should be cancelled. Its only tough measures and active enforcements that can even begin to stifle the continuation of female infanticide. Let's hope they are taken soon.

2004-11-25T11:44:00.000-08:00

Back at last to update the blog. Computer crashed and remained that way for quite some time thereby rendering me out in the cold.Had enough to keep me busy but then when you dont have something you miss it the most and it was no different in my case.
The Best Bakery case seems to drag on the it seems rather ominous that there will be no dispensing of justice at least not to those who truly deserve it but only the scrapegoats will pay the price for it. Thats the beauty of politics. Get all your dirty work done by someone else and stay clean for your lifetime. I hope those things they say about justice given after death is true or maybe its just something we commoners hope for in the hope that some day they (the wrong doers) get their comeuppance.

2004-11-13T11:51:00.000-08:00

Waheeda Rehman. One of the most beautiful women to ever appear on a movie screen. Had I been of the past generation I would be one of those of who stood outside her house just to catch a glimpse of her. Poetry in motion on screen she carries the same grace off the screen. Has aged a bit since this photo was taken but then will never age in the movies and continues to mesmerise.

2004-11-13T11:43:00.000-08:00

Zinedine Zidane aka 'Zizou' aka The God of the football field. The man must have magnets attached to his feet because the ball once at his feet seems to stick there until he usually dispatches it with the grace of a dancer and the precision of a surgeon to its destination. Currently in Real Madrid and unfortunately retired from international football. The man has given a new meaning to the word 'playmaker' and has changed football. At least for the present day. Watch out for a young guy named Ronaldinho for the future.

2004-11-13T11:41:00.000-08:00

My favourite band. If you have nothing good to say about them then its best you say nothing about them (at least not to me)

2004-11-13T11:36:00.000-08:00

My favourite guys. The rest of the family doesnt really like me and hence refused to pose for the snap

Diwali is here

2004-11-13T10:35:00.000-08:00

And diwali is here again bringing with it joy, colour, light (perhaps a bit more than necessary) and sound (which is definitely unnecessary). I always say that Mumbai sounds like a war zone when its Diwali with the distant booms (thankfully though not that of artillery but the local firework 'bomb') and if you are the kind who likes peace and quiet then this isnt the place to be this time of the year. They say the amount of fireworks in Mumbai during diwali is directly proportional to the prosperity and the economic well-being of the people. This year it sounds like people are doing pretty well for themselves and are able to burn money on a blaze of technicolour fireworks. It pains my heart to see so much money quite literally go up in smoke but then people have different ideas about celebrating festivals though I wish it didnt involve so much noise and smoke.
I had an offer to witness the actual Lakshmi (goddess of wealth ) puja at a friends place but couldnt go finally since I wanted to study. Its another matter that there wasnt much studying done but then atleast the thought was there. Perhaps the greatest problem is following thought with action and thats my greatest fault but then I think I am not the only one with that problem. Diwali also ushers in a whole lot of sweets and if you like to eat sweets this is like being in heaven. This is also a time of regret since most of the time I overeat sweets and then feel sick and sugary up to my brain. It is also a time for promises because I always promise myself never to eat so many sweets again but then the next year am on my back again after overeating sweets. This year has been no different and I am tired of eating sweets and crave anything that has anything besides sweet in it. But I promise that I will not over indulge again, at least not until next year.

Yasser Arafat is no more

2004-11-11T11:33:00.000-08:00

Today Yasser Arafat died. While the world bemoans his loss I am suddenly filled with doubt about his greatness. I am no Israel supporter nor am I a supporter of Palestine though at times my symapthy lies with Palestine for the needless oppression they have to endure. Ariel Sharon is perhaps the worst thing to happen to Israel but then I am no expert on world politics.
Yasser Arafat was a soldier and though he died a diplomat I am sure he would rather be known as a soldier even in his death rather than a politician or a diplomat. According to me there are two types of soldiers: the ones who use violence and others who don't. Gandhi belonged to the latter. He fought the British with nothing in his hand and used caste and religion in a polarized nation to his advantage to motivate people to fight for freedom. Critics will argue that if it hadnt been for the 2nd world war India would never have got her freedom but then the fact remains that the major freedom struggle was led by Gandhi and it was that very freedom struggle that delivered independence.
Arafat beleived in the gun from the very beginning, he never apologized for it; in fact he glorified it and was a romantic hero with a gun in his belt and head cover with a benign smile firmly placed on his face. He never shied away from violence and endorsed it and beleived it to be right. I am not one for violence and fact remains Arafat has been behind some of the worst attacks ever. The end has been achieved, there is a Palestine state permanently under seige, however it can be seen that this was achieved after he shed the weapons and clad the garb of a diplomat. The means used to achieve an end are equally imporatnt and cannot be ignored. Arafat has died with a lot of blood on his hands and I wonder whether such a person should be glorified as a hero. According to me a violent hero while romantic and easily visible is an oppressor to another. Arafat may have obtained the land he desired but the price he has made innocent people pay can never be forgiven. I shall repeat again at this point that I am not an Israel supporter but then I feel the attention accorded to such a man should not make him out to be greater than he actually was. He was a terrorist and then a diplomat, let us remember Arafat as that and nothing else.

2004-11-07T10:07:00.000-08:00

Where I live

Exchanging a vest and other matters

2004-11-06T23:36:00.000-08:00

Went to exchange a vest that my mom had bought but turned out to be shorter than what it was supposed to be. Its damn unusual, if you go to an underwear store irrespective of whether it is for men or women you will find only women there. Its almost embarassing to be standing next to a woman asking for the same thing that she is. You suddenly have a doubt whether you are in the right store since even ladies seem to be buying the same underwear. God forbid you have to buy ladies underwear then it would be even worse. At least the clerks at the male underwear store have no doubt as to who will be wearing the purchases but go to a womens store and ask for underwear and you will most probably elicit the raised eyebrow and sly smiles. I am joined in the small store by a middle aged gentleman and his wife. He asks for a pair of shorts, and is shown a variety and finally picks one. He seems a bit out of sorts though and finally his wife voices the complaint ,"Don't you have anything shorter?" That arouses my interest in him and I take a look at the shorts. They are already rather short and seem rather wide as well and if the guy were to raise his legs while walking I am sure his fellow walkers would be treated to sights they would do well without. The nether regions of the man seem to be barely too far up the length of fabric. I then take a look at his wife to see if she's the kinky kind (not that I would know what the kinky kind is merely by looking at someone) but all I can judge is that she is middle aged and can glare as though she would like you to self combust in a trice. This brings me back to a topic I am continually fascinated by, the amount of skin visible in society these days. This gentleman is part of the club that wears short shorts (and when I say short i mean short) and do tasks that continually expose regions that would rather not be seen. I mean I am all for freedom of expression and all that but then at times freedom I guess comes at a price.
Incidentally just heard that Bush has won his second term in office thereby affirming my belief that Americans are the weridest people on earth. They have proof of his incompetence, they know he is smarter than the average amoeba but not by much, they know he is corrupt, they know he wages wars purely for the sake of waging war and yet they have the incompetence to elect him back to power. If they were in the same position as some voters in India where they are coerced to vote for someone or they have to choose between the ballot and life then I could understand such a choice. But living in 'a land of the free' and claiming to be the brains of the world and then voting an idiot back to power only indicates the stupidity of the average American. Fear with reason and cause is understandable and forgivable but paranoia is not. Paranoia about fears that arent there and fear for the sake of fearing is sad and indicative of a society that is not as brave as it beleives itself to be. A tragedy to be re-enacted America seems to love its tragedies in multiples. Good luck to you America and God save the world.

Why I want condom ads to undergo a makeover

2004-11-06T10:07:00.000-08:00

There’s a lot of sex on TV these days that’s something that no one who watches TV can disagree with. It is discussed, debated about, and analyzed in a million ways and in some cases even performed on TV. If you thought pornography well then that’s one part of it where there is an actual graphic display of copulation however Indian television (thankfully) hasn’t jumped on that bandwagon yet. Imagine getting caught watching some movie in which the characters start having sex on screen while you live in India, it would be an absolute disgrace. In fact over here getting caught watching our equivalent of sex is bad enough (which basically involves orgasmic faces and simulated sex) so you can imagine the implications of going one level higher. But nonetheless there have been numerous instances when the bar has been moved a bit upwards ever so often by condom ads. They usually either involve the government approved image of a couple holding hands with coy smiles on their faces or consist of really bold images that would cause your parents to change the channel promptly. Kamasutra was a trailblazer in this form of advertising and we had a model cavorting more than semi-naked under waterfalls while a male model aggressively kissed her neck. They were provocative, sexy and definitely didn’t confuse you with regards to what they were selling and what the product was meant for. Okay they didn’t say how to use it but then it was an advertisement and not a how-to-use manual.
I liked those ads. For five minutes that were usually filled with inane advertisements of aged stars selling hair oils and other nonsense; you suddenly had 30 seconds of pure titillation. For any adolescent guy these were a welcome break from the drab ads and often provided the most risqué visuals since most of the other programs either faded out or showed the pleasured face of a woman to denote sex. Here suddenly was this ad that showed us the birds and bees rather explicitly and without any regrets. Sure the channel got changed if your parents were there but then when they weren’t that’s when the ads earned their worth.
However now there has been a drastic change in the advertising of condoms. The new focus is on associating the product with the pleasure and intimacy of the act. Now while this campaign may provide new ads that are far less steamier than the original set it causes great confusion in the minds of viewers like me. Now even an average commercial that looks fairly innocuous and plain could turn out to be for condoms. Now this isn’t so much of a problem when there are only adults watching however this is a problem if kids under 9 are watching. (Above that age believe me most of them know all about it) I mean no one wants to watch the ad where the guy is shown evidently being so happy buying a condom or after the act and then be asked by the kid who was watching,” What is a condom?” You really can’t blame the child after all what is seen is a guy or a couple evidently very happy because they have used this product and suddenly the child is curious as to what it is. And if you are the kind that doesn’t mind facing questions from a young, innocent, bambi-eyed child about matters of birds and bees then you have my salutations. As a result of this change in strategy in advertisement I have missed a chewing gum commercial quite a number of times (the ad starts with this couple holding hands walking in park really happy. what was I supposed to think given the current trend?) thinking it was a commercial for you know what while every time the actual commercial comes I always end up not changing the channel simply because I don’t realize what it is for until its too late.(A voice in my head invariably goes, “NOOOOOOOOO!”) If you are reading this and have anything to do with the advertising of condoms then please, I beg of you, do something and take it back to the original style. It provided both the titillation as well as you knew what ad it was the moment the first frame appeared on screen

Walking on Carter road

2004-11-06T10:05:00.000-08:00

Took a walk along the sea face today in the evening. Perhaps my only break in the entire day spent outside the house and by god i utilized it to the fullest. Walked till I was out of breath and then sat on the promenade watching people walk by. Carter Road is in Bandra and is a long promenade that stretches for about a kilometer and a half by a rocky sea side. Since this road is near the posh Pali Hill area it attracts a lot of people from there who come there for a walk or a jog depending on how inclined they are towards fitness and speed. I prefer jogging though I dont do that all the time but it is a lovely feeling to run by the sea side as fast as i can go with the wind whistling by my short (almost clean shaven) head and reaching the end of the promenade out of breath but totally alive. I sat there and watched people,children, the aged, the cripple, the rich and the poor all walk by the same sea unmindful of each other and yet horribly aware of where they were. The rich and well to do walk faster for they have an exercise regimen to stick to, the poor amble by staring enviously at the rich and enjoying those few moments of freedom from their daily burdens, the children trot alongside their maids or their parents depending on the wealth of their parents, the aged sit and watch the others rush by and wonder about how at one time they too were consumed by the same sense of urgency and smile occasionally at anyone who looks at them perhaps seeing a bit of themselves in that person for a fleeting instant. Its sad to see some of the kids of today with jaded looks in their eyes even before they have truly experienced childhood. I firmly beleive that to know the fate of the world look into the eyes of a child. If there is no innocence, if the smile is fake and the child talks like an adult then you know that the future of the world is doomed. The children of today grow up too fast and we expect them to join the rat race, we run in daily, too soon. Its sad but perhaps one of the prices we will pay for a fast and hectic lifestyle that we have created for ourselves. Another fantastic feature of the present day is the amount of skin suddenly displayed by people. At one time if you wore shorts and walked about you were a maverick of some sort and if you wore revealing clothes then well the less said the better. But suddenly skin is on display everywhere. Guys, girls and evreyone else seem to have realized that the time is ripe to show off the skin no matter what lies beneath those clothes. So suddenly arms are being bared, stomachs tucked in and prominently displayed, underpants making more than the normal peek-a-boo appearance, as my friend Kaustubh would say its the awakening of the Indian middle class. He may be right but at times the sights are a plain assault on your senses. At times of course its not so bad (as long as the skin visible is feminine) but then at times the amount of skin shown would take away your attention from anything. They say there are more accidents occuring daily on Carter Road, walk down the road and if you are the average red-blooded guy dont be surprised to find yourself walking into a lamp post.

Meeting with Teacher

2004-11-06T10:04:00.000-08:00

First of the exams is over and with it comes a wave of relief and trepidation. The beginning of the end or the dawn of a new beginning which one it is to be no one knows. I hope to tilt it in favour of the latter though only time will tell how successful I will be. The day was an average day with its share of interesting moments and its share of the usual mundane moments. Met a teacher who taught me in school. Its so weird. At one time I had to look from below to see her and now suddenly I am taller and suddenly the same person who was tall and intimidating because of her height is now an average lady. She surprisingly recognized me though she didnt remeber my name (but then that would be asking for too much expecting her to remember a mouse/bookworm like me) Teacher Alice Carvalho was one of those people who teach you maybe a subject or two but it is the weird things they do that stay in your memory forever and with time you realise how much she actually taught you maybe not with reagrds to the subject but just about how to be a better person. She is an extremely mother-like lady. She would chide us for any small mistake but there would be no malicious criticism it would almost be like getting a earful from your mother. She would insist on you dotting the i's and crossing the t's and many other minor things that you really wouldnt pay too much attention to. An extremely nice lady she is one of those teachers I never thanked much and now wish I had. An excellent teacher and an even better person Mrs. Alice Carvalho is among the best people I have had the good fortune of knowing.

Famous human body parts

2004-11-06T10:02:00.000-08:00

I am tired of constantly reading about the anatomy of celebrities so often. Why the big deal if some celebrity actor breaks his hand or foot while doing his stunts? The actor is spoken of as being someone valorous as though if he had pulled off the stunt our world would have been saved from certain doom. Politicians injure themselves and suddenly the media goes into a tizzy about it. Here is my list of the most famous pieces of anatomy that have had more than their deserved share of coverage by the media.

1> Atal Bihari Vajpayee's knee: A 78 year old man has a bad knee and has to have surgery. Mundane right? Wrong. When you are the prime minister of the worlds biggest democracy every problem you have is the problem faced by 1 billion people. At least thats what the Indian media thinks. So for about a month prior to the surgery we were suddenly innundated with information regrading the surgery. The doctor (dr. Ranawat i beleive) became a public figure and something on the lines of the man who would deliver us all from our misery.(actually he would by finishin the surgery and ending all the media madness) The surgery was performed, Vajpayee walked and all of us heaved a collective sigh of relief. I am sure the media had conpired to break the other knee so that they would have a whole lot more to fill up paper with but unfortunately the BJP went and lost the next election thereby putting Vajpayee's knee out of the equation.

2>Sachin Tendulkar's elbow, knee, back etc,etc: The master blaster in the course of a hard and long career has found himself at times nursing injuries that have kept hin out of the Indian cricket team for prolonged periods. When he injured his back the nation sat and analyzed it and every fool in this country who has ever held a bat or even seen Tendulkar carrying his had an opinion to give on how to cure it. More recently the poor chap had tennis elbow and again the same madness where a million opinions were there on how to cure it. He should be playing soon, though how well he can play with an elbow that hurts and with a billion expectations resting on a formerly injured back remains to be seen.

3>Pamela Andersons breasts: What (heterosexual) guy or thirsty baby hasnt looked at that chest and wondered what it would take for the to have their head in between those two huge breasts. Giving a new meaning to 'silicone' valley Pamela redefined sexuality or at least breasts for a long time. Where ever you looked they were there enticing, inviting and intimidating. Every guy's fantasy, every girls reason for frustration (with the males obsession with mammary glands) and every thirsty baby's desire.She did reduce them in size but with the silicone went the fame and she is reduced to writing pornography to try and reclaim the lost fame since the breasts are gone for good.

4>Jennifer Lopez's butt: Big, firm and rounded better than basketballs they came to signify something I am sure, though I am still trying to figure out what. The media went into a spin about her backside and she flashed it every chance she got. In her case it was like being paid to expose your butt to society and moon us all. I was always willing to do the same for free though no offers yet. She still flashes the famous derriere at the cameras and now even has a singing (whining )career. Her singing hasnt eclipsed her butt yet butt it is expected that with time someone else will be the butt of all our fantasies.

5>Beckhams metasarasal(?) bone: Apparently its a bone in your foot that you can fracture. This is what I learnt after the single legged footballer (you mean he can use his left foot??) with a right foot that delivers magical goals fractured it during a league match. Kieron Dyer, the perpetrator of the crime, was villified while Beckham forgave him and rested in a variety of chambers to heal in time for the World Cup. Though the bone supposedly wasnt so bad by the time the world cup started the focus shifted to his hairstyle and soon the tiny bone that gave him an excuse for his failure in the world cup was forgotten.

6> George Bush's Brain (rather the lack of it): The man has been on a roll and has gone on to prove that you dont need a brain to be the most powerful man in the world as long as you have money, money and more money. Wars, feet in mouth and nonsense apart he continues to run the American government and is still "hunting down the axis of terror" a war that seems almost like shadow boxing in a china shop. The only thing in his defence is that the American people voted him to power so all the blame cant exactly be put on him because there is a nation of people that support him no matter what he does.

Why I didnt vote during the state elections

2004-11-06T10:00:00.000-08:00

The recent elections that were held in my home state were an absolute pain. More so for me because I have lost my faith in the institution of elections in this country and am irritated with the psuedo-activism thats doing the rounds. I hate people coming to tell me to vote, telling me of responsibilities I am aware of and trying to make me feel guilty about the plight of the nation and even worse creating the illusion that I can actually absolve myself of my duties merely by voting. Poverty is rampant, social divides grow and regionalism seems to be the order of the day for modern Indian politics. The Great Indian Middle Class is now in its activist mode.It has decided that it has been ignored by politicians and has been ignorant of politics for too long. The power is gradually shifting to the poor who vote on the basis of money and empty promises that they hope will be fulfilled. As per some reports more than 51%of India's population languishes in poverty which is something politicians love. A poor man is an optimal vote bank. If lucre and promises fail to attract, force is always an alternative. The middle class has witnessed a great change in its fortunes and as a result its value in the political arena has reduced. In the early 90's the middle class was above the poor but by not too much. The middle class and the poor often received raw deals from the policy makers and fought their battles together.The middle class identified somewhat with the poor and often they had the same issues to fight for. The middle class provided the vocal protest for itself as well as for the poor. After the increase in the prosperity of the middle class things have changed. The middle class no longer considers itself too far below the rich and is now trying to achieve the very status it at one time considered the root of evil in society. The middle class grew richer and richer and gradually forgot entirely about its protests. Water and food which was an issue wasnt one any more for the middle class while it is still one for the poor.Gradually the middle class moved on to other issues while the numbers of the poor continued to grow. It still grows at an alarming rate and is extremely threatening.
Politicians have realized that this is where their real vote bank lies. Think about it. If an MP gets 1 crore as his fund he may have to spend less to keep a thousand poor people happy while he might have to spend three times as much to keep 100 middle class people somewhat satisfied. As a result it is seen that there are more gains that arise from spending less for the poor than spending more on the middle class and still not being sure of their votes. The poor are easier to satisfy. Its sort of like giving a small kid a small sweet and he will be happy for a long time and remember you for it while buy a teenager a truck of chocolates and he will continue to gripe. Give a poor man basic shelter, or maybe a small job and he will treat you as God while give all possible things to the middle class and they still demand. So a politician saves a lions share of his fund and also keeps a significant portion of his vote bank. The middle class now realises that it is being ignored and doesnt like it.So suddenly we are in activist mode. We now want to prove to the political fraternity that we still weild the power we think we do. So we suddenly go into overdrive about our voting responsibilities and other nonsense. The middle class just wants its old say in the state of affairs again and is trying hard to get to where it was while holding on to the new lifestyle it has adapted to. I believe I will vote when the next election comes if I feel any of the candidates deserve my support. If not I wont bother, anyway my vote is pretty much of academic significance.